Tuesday, May 24 - The day before our due date!
Although I can't say I honestly thought I would make it this far, I was looking forward to (what I thought would be) our last doctor's visit before our little man arrived. However, the news from the doctor was the same as every weekly appointment in May - only 1 cm dialated and hardly thinned out. Matt and I were presented with two options from the doctor: we could go ahead and schedule a c-section to take the baby or we could go up to a week past our due date to see if Baby Tanner would come on his own. Since the doctor encouraged allowing him to come on his own and a c-section was a last resort for me, the decision was made to come back for another appointment the following week and see where we stand. However, the doctor did have some concerns. First, Baby T was measuring very inconsistently - every week in May was different - a week ahead, a week behind, two weeks ahead, etc. She was concerned with his size, so we were scheduled for an ultrasound on Tuesday, May 31, the day after Memorial Day, and would then meet with the doctor to discuss the results. Her second concern was that I was not having contractions yet - or the ones I thought I was having were questionable. I was having more cramping that would last for hours, rather than contractions. Matt and I were hopeful for the news the following week.
Wednesday, May 25 - Due Date
Eager to get out of the house, I ran up to the school to see my sweet kids on their last day and take them popsicles and eat lunch out with Matt. It was my first time driving in a while, but by this point I was ready to get out of the house for a bit! I knew when I took on carrying around a little one for an extra week there would be physical challenges. Once Matt got home, my back had gotten the best of me and I suggested going for a quick swim before dinner to ease the pressure off my back. Here is a quick shot of Aiden on his due date before Matt and I left to go for a swim...
Friday, May 27
After dinner I suggested a walk around the neighborhood, as we did most nights in efforts to bring on labor. It was not long before I was cramping and having pains. As we decided on a final lap around the circle, I struggled to finish the walk. As we got closer to the house there were moments I had to stop to let the pains pass before taking another step. We came back in the house and I went straight back to the bed to lie down. Matt and I admitted later we were both secretly very anxious and excited that night going to bed. I don't think either of us wanted to say anything, but I think we were both hopeful this was the start of the arrival of our little boy. However, we both woke up disappointed Saturday morning.
Tuesday, May 31
Knowing this would be the last trip to the doctor (and my level of comfort in dire need of help), I was eager and anxious for whatever news she had. The ultrasound also made me eager for the visit because we had not seen our little man since December. But the ultrasound turned out to be nothing I expected - he was HUGE! The ultrasound tech said his head was extremely big and that his tummy was so large the computer could not even register the size. The look on her face said it all when the computer estimated him to weight around 9.5 pounds. Her remarks to us as we left to see the doctor were, "Good luck delivering the hoss!" (Not really what I wanted to hear at the moment, as I knew that spelled out the makings of a c-section).
Matt tried to calm me in the waiting room, already knowing what was going through my head. The doctor confirmed - Baby Tanner was so big he was unable to fit through my pelvis to enter the birth canal. As a result, he was basically stuck - my body couldn't push him down (which was why I was not contracting, just constant cramping) and I was not thinned out hardly at all (because the baby was not being pushed down). She said we had two options again: schedule a c-section or we could try an induction if I still really wanted to delivery naturally. We asked her what she felt would be best and without hesitation she answered "c-section." She said she does not usually encourage moms (especially on their first pregnancy) to not attempt labor at all and schedule the c-section, but said she felt this would be a "traumatic delivery," where they would either have to break the baby's shoulder to get him out (if my body did respond to the induction, which she was not hopeful about) or it would lead to an emergency c-section (which she said she felt would be most likely). Matt and I did not hesitate to schedule the c-section for the next day, knowing it would be what was best for the baby and for me.
Wednesday, June 1 - BIRTH day!
Matt and I spent a nice, relaxing morning after getting up very early - both of us far too anxious to sleep. Before getting up, we decided on the most important thing first - our little man would be named Aiden Matthew. Aiden was a name Matt and I have both liked for a while and after seeing a very fiesty, kicking, wiggling little boy at our first ultrasound in December and learning that Aiden meant "fiery," it seemed to fit. Matthew comes from his daddy's middle name. With the name finalized, we enjoyed a calm morning since we did not have to be at the hospital until 10:00. Here are the last few shots of sweet Aiden and mom before we left to go to the hospital... (exactly 41 weeks)
Look, no hands!
Car is packed and time to go!
Once we arrived at the hospital, things moved smoothly, but quickly. I was immediately taken back and prepped for surgery. I was changed, hooked up to monitors, hooked up to an IV, and prepped about what would happen. The anesthesiologist came in and I was given the epidural. My nurse continued to tell me that I could touch my belly now, but once back in the OR, I couldn't touch anymore. She told me this so frequently, I wondered if I was supposed to be touching my belly more? I soon realized what she meant - as I left Matt to be taken to the OR, I had my hand on my belly and felt Aiden kick. However, it wasn't the type of kick that I normally felt since I realized I was numb from the chest down. This was a kick like what everyone else felt - I could feel it on my hand, but no longer feel him inside of me. I had a few tears as reality set in that this was the last time I would ever feel my little boy inside me, despite how ready I thought I was to get him out after months together. I spent the next few moments on the table with my arms as wrapped tightly around my belly as I could get them, holding my little man while the doctors continued to prep for the surgery.
As my arms were moved, the next few moments are a blur - a sheet was put up to block my view, Matt came in to sit with me, a nurse told me they were beginning, there was pressure, and then a little cry! Aiden Matthew was born at 12:24 p.m. and weighed 8 lbs 13 oz!
Love at first sight!
Aiden and Mommy meeting for the first time!
Back in the recovery room after surgery, spending our first hour as a family of three!
Not sure who snapped this one, but it has become my favorite. This is in the hall on the way from the recovery room to being moved to the second floor, our home for the next 3 days.
Once on the second floor, it was time for the first picture of our new family!
My second favorite picture of the day - just a few moments before the family came in to meet Aiden for the first time.
The rest of the day, unfortunately, is nothing much than a blur. Once on the second floor I was put on morphine for the pain, which my body did not react well to. The medicine had me VERY out of it - I look very confused in most of the remaining pictures of the day and Matt said I often would daze out, where I looked awake, but my eyes were closed. Along with slurred speech and not making much sense, the hardest side effect was the vomitting - NOT an easy task for my stomach and abs and stitches and staples after the surgery.
We spent the next few days in the hospital soaking up every moment of our sweet little boy. There were even a few moments early on Friday morning after a 4 a.m. feeding that Matt and I sat in the hospital bed and watched our little boy in amazement as he peacefully looked at us, I am sure wondering who these silly people were that kept kissing him and talking to him as the sun came up. I repeatedly told Matt parenting was not this easy and we should not be fooled - we had not heard the child cry more than a whimper during our time in the hospital. The doctor even commented that he was the best baby she had ever had for a circumcision - he barely made a peep. However, all that changed on Saturday.
Saturday, June 4
Saturday was meant to be our discharge day and we had BIG plans. I had bought the perfect outfit, we were going to stop by Star Lake for a quick picture on the way home to show Aiden where his mom and dad had their first date, their first kiss, and their first walk on the night they were married. We would then wrap up by taking too many pictures once we arrived home to commemorate the occasion. But life never happens that way. When the nurse came in to go over our discharge information around 1:00 p.m., she had to do her final check of Aiden before we left. She said she would go ahead and remove the bandage around his circumcision, despite other nurses telling us it would come off on its own. She struggled to remove it, and once it was finally off Aiden began to SCREAM. And he screamed and screamed and screamed. Matt and I wanted to wait to leave the hospital until Aiden finished crying, but 2:00 came and went, then 3:00, then 4:00. Aiden continued to scream - he would not nurse, he would not sleep, he would not take his pacifier, he could not be calmed. Then 5:00 came and went and we were approaching 6:00. With our nerves on end and needing to just get out of the small hospital room and knowing that pharmacies would be closing soon, we decided to put our screaming child in the carseat and just tough it out. Fortunately, the car ride home pacified Aiden to a quick nap, while his mom lost it. I cried the entire way home - knowing my sweet boy was in so much pain and there was NOTHING I could do about it. (Although at moments I thought punching that nurse might actually make me feel better) Once we got home and Aiden was out of the car, the screaming started again and continued through midnight into the early hours of the morning until exhaustion set in - for all of us!
Overall parenting has been quite an adventure - as you can tell! I am sure we have not seen the last of the ups and downs, but it has been such a wonderful experience. I feel the best thing to leave you with are the things that have filled my mind the most over the past two weeks (well, besides Aiden!) - James 1:17 - "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father, with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change" and Psalm 127:3 - "Children are a gift of the Lord."
To My Son, Sweet Aiden, 
I have spent getting to know each other. I cannot begin to tell you how quickly these past 3 weeks have gone by and it pains me to think that we only have a few weeks left before you and I cannot spend our days together anymore. I knew the first moment we met that you were something special. You had my heart at your first look, when the doctors handed you to me and and your big, bright eyes looked at me, and for a moment the whole world stood still. 
been to our family. We can't believe how our lives have changed in just a year - that this time last summer we were talking about possibly starting a family and now we have one! We agreed that you, Aiden, have been the greatest part of our marriage. You have made our relationship stronger and shown us that we need each other's love and support, especially during hard times. In the past 3 weeks you have shown us that communication, teamwork, and encouraging each other can get us through even the toughest challenges we will face. Your dad and I agreed that you have brought a deeper appreciation and love for each other that no one else could do. Your dad and I also agreed that you have shown us Christ's love more than anything else as well. You are truly a gift from Him and we feel so blessed that the Lord has entrusted us with you. I am not sure how anyone can look at a newborn and not be amazed at God's power and love. You are a blessing, Aiden, and your dad and I are reminded of this each time you look at us with your big beautiful eyes that never cease to make my heart melt. 
